Now, I sit for those 15 seconds while everyone sings Happy Birthday, and in all honesty, it feels a little awkward. I mean, who do I look at? I usually end up staring at the cake, sneaking a timid glance up every once in awhile just to see everyone staring at me.
I also don't like the attention while I'm opening gifts either. I open them and hope I don't react horribly. I want to show them how much you love the gift, but I'm not that good of an actor. Not that I get bad gifts, but its just hard to show enthusiasm for the gift card when you just opened a super thoughtful Princess Bride board game from your sister (I'm a Princess Bride fan and the gift was very thoughtful).
This year, however, I end my birthday celebration weekend feeling very blessed. After you go through a wedding, you begin to understand that people want an opportunity to celebrate you. They want to give you something. And as an avid, over-enthusiastic gift-giver myself, I understand that. I understand that elation you feel getting something for your friend that you know she will really love. You get so much joy out of giving.
So, this birthday I tried to bask in the attention for the sake of my friends and family. To really enjoy this time so that they can enjoy it. It's not my natural instinct. I actually don't like being in the center of attention. I don't like the "Wow, you did such a great job!" attention or the "Whoa...did you do something to your hair?" attention. Praise and encouragement doesn't speak to me.
But I did. I tried to really be the Birthday Girl for them, and what I walked away with was just joy. The wonderful feeling of being loved. People do love me. As much as that sounds self-centered, sometimes I forget just how many people do. A yearly reminder isn't such a bad thing after all.
Now off to write some thank you notes. :)
Soli Deo Gloria.
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Related posts:
The Gift of Giving
Learning from Lent
My Problem with Christians
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